Overcoming Shame (study) pt 6


“The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?” Proverbs 18:14

We must allow God to enable us to love Him.
We must allow God to love others through us.
We must allow God to help us love ourselves.

There are three (primary) kinds of love in the Greek language:


Eros – “physical” passionate love, with sensual desire and longing

Philia – “mental” love. It means affectionate regard or friendship in both ancient and modern Greek. This type of love has give and take.

Agape – This love is selfless; it gives and expects nothing in return.

ex: If you give an offering to GET something in return (prosperity), that is not agape love. You aren’t loving God with that offering—it’s philia. An agape offering is given because you love not because of what you hope/expect to get back.

John 3:16 —For God so AGAPE the world….Jesus died for everyone knowing he’d never get a return on that offer of love from many people.

Matthew 5:45 “…He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”

The earth is beautiful for all of us…whether we deserve that beauty or not. God’s love gives that to us regardless of whether we give back to Him at all.

If we don’t deal with shame now, we will deal with it someday or we will never make it.

When people have shame, they either say “What’s the use?” & live horribly or they try to be good in order to prove that they are not bad….the problem is that no matter how good they act, they still don’t FEEL good.

Feelings don’t have to be true to be real and you act out what you feel regardless of facts.

I may do things to try to make others feel good about me but what I’m really doing is trying to make MYSELF feel good about me.

I may know that I have a problem…but don’t know what’s messed up….I may pray harder, try harder….but it doesn’t seem to work…..

Confronting the source of shame is scary.

Burying something doesn’t keep it from affecting you. Pushing it from your conscious into your subconscious….into your spirit…guarantees it will have more effect than if you think about it every day. When it’s buried, you will think, act and react certain ways and won’t even understand why you’re doing it.

Shame can lie to you to the point that you believe shame rather than the Word of God. We say things to ourselves that we would never allow anyone else say to us… The love of God would not allow me to talk to myself like that. Only shame does that.

The adversary is the accuser of the brethren (Rev 12:10). When I’m talking bad about myself, I’m listening to what the adversary is saying to me & I’m repeating it.


If we haven’t confronted the source of shame yet, we must do so immediately and then pray against the spirit of shame…forgive others, forgive God and forgive ourselves.

Speaking it aloud is releasing it…..giving it to God.

“Lord, by Your help and grace, I forgive and release myself for _______ and I claim healing for my mind body and soul in Jesus name!”

Take dominion over the spirit of shame in the name of JESUS!!

(credit to Charles Wright & Tabernacle of Joy..you can look this study up on YouTube if you’d like to jump ahead.)

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